Last week, I watched one of my team members, Sara, quietly log into our Monday morning call. Her camera was on, her face was blank, and her usual spark was noticeably dimmed.
I had a choice. I could have launched right into our agenda—metrics, timelines, client issues. Instead, I paused.
“Hey Sara, before we dive in—how are things on your side? Anything weighing heavy right now?” She looked up, surprised. Then, after a beat, she exhaled. Turns out, her team had been thrown a surprise client fire-drill the night before. They were scrambling to meet the latest tax deadline. She was tired. Frustrated. Doing her best not to let anyone down.
We shifted the priorities from our Monday meeting. Everyone else left and me and Sara talked. She didn’t need me to fix her problems. She needed me to see her. That’s it. And that moment—small as it seemed—reminded me of a truth we often forget:
You can’t lead people effectively if you don’t first meet them where they are.
The Leadership Mistake We All Make
It’s easy to get lost in the numbers. In the deadlines. In the pressure to perform. We want progress. We want performance. We want predictability.
But here’s what happens when we ignore what our people are carrying:
- Trust erodes quietly.
- Engagement drops subtly.
- Turnover creeps in gradually.
And then we act surprised when burnout hits and nobody wants to stay.
The Data Is Crystal Clear
If you think empathy is just about being “nice,” think again. Gallup’s research shows that highly engaged teams are 21% more profitable and 17% more productive than their peers. A study by Catalyst found that 61% of employees with empathetic leaders were more likely to be innovative, and 76% more likely to stay with their company.
The message is loud and clear: Empathy isn’t fluff. It’s performance fuel.
Sara’s Moment Wasn’t Unique—It Was a Mirror
What happened with Sara wasn’t about one employee having a rough morning. It was about a deeper principle: Every person on your team is carrying something you can’t see.
- Some are managing sick parents.
- Some are quietly doubting their own abilities.
- Some are just trying to hold it together through a hard week.
And when leaders ignore that, we send an unspoken message: “Only your output matters. You, as a human, are secondary.” Nobody says that out loud. But people feel it. And it shapes everything.
So What Does Meeting People Where They Are Look Like?
It’s not about becoming a therapist. It’s not about coddling. It’s about tuning in. Adjusting. Being human.
Here’s a framework I use with my team:
1. Pause & Ask:
Start every one-on-one or team meeting with a genuine check-in:
“What’s weighing on you today?”
“What do I need to understand about your week before we get started?”
2. Listen for the Unsaid:
If someone says “I’m fine” but they’re clearly not? Name it gently or consider taking it off-line:
“You don’t seem like your usual self—want to talk about it?”
3. Flex with Intention:
If someone’s underwater, adjust the expectations. Shift a meeting. Reprioritize. Not permanently—but strategically.
4. Normalize It Across the Culture:
Let your team see you doing this consistently. Empathy isn’t a reward for results—it’s the starting point for everyone.
5. Track What Changes:
Want proof it works? Watch the ripple effects:
– Engagement ticks up.
– Turnover slows.
– Clients are happier.
– Innovation flows.
The Leadership Legacy You Leave
Here’s the truth no one talks about enough: Your team will never remember how many deadlines you hit. They’ll remember how they felt when they worked with you.
Did they feel heard?
Did they feel safe?
Did they feel like their life outside of work mattered to you?
Those answers become your real legacy.
The Challenge
This week, don’t just lead your people. See them.
Pause before you push.
Ask before you assume.
Meet them—wherever they are.
Because when you do? They’ll go further than you ever imagined. But more importantly—so will you.
You’ll move from managing tasks to shaping lives.
You’ll stop reacting to stress and start building trust.
You’ll stop wondering why your people aren’t giving more, and realize they were just waiting to be seen.
So here’s your invitation—try it. Once. This week.
– Ask one person a question you don’t normally ask.
– Create space in a meeting to check in on more than deliverables.
– Give someone the gift of being understood without fixing them.
You might think it won’t matter. But I promise you—it will.
And if enough of us start doing this? We won’t just build better teams. We’ll build a better profession. One human moment at a time.
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Tags: Firm Management
